Narcissit? Who me?

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Surprise Surprise!

It seems, in this crazy messed up world we live in, there are a limited number of responses to outside stimuli. When that outside stimuli is of a surprising nature there are, for instance, only two reasonable reactions.

1) Complete and utter outrage; or

2) Complete and utter delight.

            One might say that it is possible for there to be other reactions, but their addition would be simply adding shades of grey. In a world, such as this messed-up, ball-of-crazy we live in, things are better looked at in black and white; or, more appropriately, as either happiness or rage.

Things that make you happy:

            Surprises worthy of utter and complete happiness are few and varied but easy to identify. Most often they follow the simple trends in commercialism. Gifts of a new car, a boat, or a sizeable check in your name are a few examples of surprises that elicit this response. Other surprises can include snow days, cancelled exams for which you haven’t studied, credit adjustments in your favor, and finding cash in your out of season jacket. The benefits of these surprises are all easy to spot, and all outweigh the hassles, and confusion that so often accompanies the shock of a surprise. I’m not the type who’s too stubborn to put aside pesky heart palpitations for the sake of surprise, it had just better be a shiny one.

Things that make you unhappy:

            This is a long list that can include a menagerie of things that can make your fists ball up with anger. Things as different as worms in your apples and spots on your oranges, that regardless of what they are, cause a never-ending tirade of sore feelings. Be they birthday parties you hadn’t planned for, or bills unexpected the surprises that make you unhappy target personally, and vary on mood to mood. Someone jumping out from behind a doorway can make me laugh on a good day, but make me file for a restraining order the next. This is why there is a longer list of these surprises as apposed to the good ones. While the idea of a sizeable check coming my way never fails to bring a smile to my face, the idea of a drop-by visitor, an unexpected phone call, or someone yelling “Boo!” loudly in my face as I turn a corner could go either way. 

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